Poli-tickle

 

Politics is very dry, dusty, drab and full of machinations. However, there’s still surprising grace and subtlety sometimes. 

I’ll start with an incident in my cadre, West Bengal. An important bill was to be discussed in the West Bengal Legislative Assembly and Chief Minister Dr. Bidhan Chandra Roy was late for the discussion. When Dr. Roy entered the session hall, Jyoti Basu (Leader of Opposition) was furious and berated him for his conduct. Dr. Roy apologised and participated in the discussions. At the end of it, he called the still-agitated Jyoti Basu aside and said in a soft voice, "Jyoti...please go home. Your father (Dr. Nishikant Basu) is seriously ill. After getting the news, I came here after attending to him at your house. I have prescribed the medicines. Make sure he takes them on time. I’ll come and see him again in the evening.” 

Back in the late 19^th Century, there were many tales of the famous rivalry between Bejamin Disraeli and William Gladstone leading to many colourful exchanges between the two. Once, Opposition Leader Gladstone told Disraeli in the Parliament, “You will come to your end either upon the gallows or of a venereal disease,” to which Prime Minister Disraeli replied, “I should say, Mr. Gladstone, that depends on whether I embrace your principles or your mistress.” 

Gandhi is not remembered enough for his simple and yet, sometimes devastating wit. Two incidents stand out around his visit to London in 1931 – the first one probably apocryphal but the second one made huge headlines at the time. When he alighted at Southampton, he was surrounded by reporters and one of them asked, “Mr. Gandhi, what do you think of Western civilization?” And Mr. Gandhi said, “That would be a good idea.” During the visit, he was invited for tea with Queen Mary and King George V at Buckingham Palace. Dressed in his customary loincloth, a shawl loosely draped over his naked torso and wearing homemade sandals, he visited the Buckingham Palace.  The meeting over, he was walking out of the palace gates when a journalist asked if he thought he was wearing enough. Gandhi’s iconic reply: “The King was wearing enough for the both of us.” 

In the U.S. Presidential elections, the TV debates between the contenders are often the difference between winning and losing. In 1984, President Ronald Reagan was trying for a second term in office and was pitted against Walter Mondale. After a shaky performance in the first debate, there were questions about his age (73) and fitness for office. The debate moderator, journalist Henry Trewhitt asked Reagan about his age and whether he had any doubt, on account of his age, to function well in a crisis. Reagan’s reply: “I have decided not to make age an issue of this campaign.” After a surprised gasp from the audience, he finished, "I am not going to exploit, for political purposes, my opponent's youth and inexperience." This brought the house down with the audience and even the opponent, Mondale, bursting into lusty laughter and is considered the main reason for Reagan’s landslide victory. 

On October 10, 2008, during a Town Hall event in Lakeville, Minnesota for the Presidential campaign of John McCain, a woman constituent called his opponent Obama an Arab and how she couldn’t trust him. McCain was trailing badly in the opinion polls at that time. Even so, he grabbed the mic and took pains to chastise his constituent, “No ma'am, he's a decent family man, citizen, that I just happen to have disagreements with on fundamental issues, and that's what this campaign is all about," 

The exchanges in the U.K. Parliament over the Partygate scandal (2021-22) were robust and filled with typical British sardonic wit. Attacked from all sides for wild parties in 10, Downing Street while the rest of the country was under COVID-19 lockdown, Prime Minister Boris Johnson had hunkered down and was fighting it out. Until a respected backbencher of his own party, David Davis rose to speak. He listed some of the achievements of the Boris government and then said, “I expect my leaders to shoulder the responsibility for the actions they take. Yesterday he (Boris) did the opposite of that. So I will remind him of a quotation which may be familiar to his ear, Leopold Amery to Neville Chamberlain: ‘You have sat too long here for any good you have been doing. In the name of God, go.’” This turned the tide decisively against Boris. And, the final nail in the coffin was driven home by another Tory member and former PM, Theresa May. Sue Gray report on the allegations had just come out. Theresa May: "What the Gray report does show is that No. 10, Downing Street was not observing the regulations they had imposed on members of the public. So either my right honourable friend (Boris) had not read the rules or didn't understand what they meant and others around him, or they didn't think the rules applied to Number 10. Which was it?" 

Back home, there were some famous exchanges between Leader of Opposition Sushma Swaraj and Prime Minister Manmohan Singh. During a fierce debate in Parliament on corruption in the UPA government, Sushma Swaraj tried to corner the government with verses of Shahab Jafri: 

'तू इधर उधर की न बात कर,

ये बता कि काफिला क्यों लुटा,

हमें रहजनों से गिला नहीं,

तेरी रहबरी का सवाल है।'  

[Stop going round and round in circles,

Tell us why the caravan was looted.

The robbers are not to blame,

We look askance at your leadership.] 

Dr. Manmohan Singh didn’t meet fire with fire. He chose to douse the rage gently with Allama Iqbal’s: 

“माना कि तेरी दीद के काबिल नहीं हूं मैं,

तू मेरा शौक देख, मेरा इंतजार देख।" 

[I may not be worthy of your benevolent gaze.

But would you look at my zeal, my patience?] 

Again, during a Motion of Thanks on the President’s address, Manmohan Singh recited Mirza Ghalib: 

“हमको उनसे है वफा की उम्मीद,

जो नहीं जानते वफा क्या है।" 

[In vain I expect loyalty from those

Who do not even know what loyalty is.]

To which Sushma replied with the lines of Bashir Badr: 

“कुछ तो मजबूरियां रही होंगी,

यूं ही कोई बेवफा नहीं होता|”               

[There must have been some compulsion;

No one becomes disloyal for nothing.] 

Time was when there was immense grace and humour even in politics. Now too there is some grace and some humour. But, not in India. Not now. Now we have Didi-o O-Didi, Kanpati par katta, Vote chor, Chowkidar chor, aur kya kya ...